As we enter the year 2006, I realize that it will have been ten long years since I graduated from high school. I think back to how I was in high school and how so much about me has changed.

In 1996, I was 17 years old. I was getting ready to embark on my college career and I was dating a guy (yes a guy) in the army. I wasn't out of the closet in high school. In fact, the thought never even crossed my mind. I was an average student. I did well enough to make my parents proud, but not well enough that I could be called a nerd. I played both basketball and soccer, excelling in each sport enough to be known as a pretty darn good athlete. I dated my high school "sweetheart" for three years and was homecoming queen my junior year. My group of friends consisted of everyone from cheerleader to class president. I didn't stand out like a sore thumb, but I didn't always feel like I blended in either. Something inside me was different.

Throughout my high school years, I knew that I liked girls. I had crushes on numerous friends of mine, but nothing too overwhelming that I couldn't keep it at bay. I was able to fend off the urges with daydreams during study hall and innocent flirting that could be easily cast aside as girls just being girls. At that point in time, I didn't think I needed to come out of the closet. At that point in time, I just didn't want to come out. Period.

I saw what could happen to those brave souls who dared to come out during high school. They weren't treated with respect. There was no gay and lesbian group for them to turn to. And most of the time, they were being picked on by other students I considered friends of mine. I didn't want that to happen to me. I didn't want to be different or considered a freak. So, I stayed hidden. And I hid my true self from all of my friends and family without even realizing it.

Looking back I wonder, if the situation were different, would I have come out during high school? If gays and lesbians were portrayed as they are in the media today back then, would that have made a difference? If there were a gay and lesbian group, would I have joined? If my friends were all just a little bit more open minded, would I have confided in them? The answer to all of those questions is simply, I don't know. I do know, however, that I am who I am today because of the road I chose to travel. There have been countless mistakes, lessons, and accomplishments along the way - all of which shaped me into the person I am today. And I wouldn't want to change that for anything.

Here in 2006, I'm completely out of the closet and I've never felt more accepted or proud of the person that I am. My only hope is that for gay and lesbian teens in high schools across the country to have things just a little bit easier than I did. I hope that they have that gay and lesbian group to turn to; that they have a good core group of students who don't care what their sexual orientation is; and that they feel safe enough to face the world instead of hiding from it as I did.

Those ten years have gone by so fast. I've changed so much, but I wonder - has high school changed as well?